07.04.05 I THOUGHT THAT SHOW WOULD BE MY LAST... Joe Longthorne has admitted he thought he would never sing again – and even wanted to die. "When the curtain fell on my last show at Blackpool Opera House last summer, I thought it was the last one I would ever do," said Joe. The ever-popular singer was recently given an all-clear after his latest bout of chemotherapy in his long battle against a recurring cancer. He added: "I have been ill before – I've had the last rites read to me twice – and I consider myself lucky to be alive. "They told me I had the lowest blood count they'd ever known so I'm lucky that I live close to the hospital – if I'd been out in the country I reckon I'd be dead by now. "I've been down that tunnel they talk about – I've seen the light here, I've been that close to death - but I'm a fighter." Despite having been given the green light on what he calls his "remission of sorts" Joe still has further tests to take on when – or as he'd like to hope, if – he has to undergo a bone marrow transplant. A nationwide search finally found a match, but a transplant would mean another month's chemotherapy – this time in Manchester rather than Blackpool, followed by the operation, a recovery period in Blackpool Vic and then six months to a year convalescence. "But I'm not letting my fans down any more," he says. As if to underline that, he recently completed a trio of successful shows in the Pleasure Beach Paradise Room and will be back two nights a week from the end of July for the summer. "I feel sharper than I have done for years – I'm much more confident and much happier on stage," he says. "Up to now the treatment has been 100 per cent successful. I don't feel ill. Last year I could feel it all coming back – I could feel my back going and it was more and more of an effort to drag myself out of bed and on to the stage. I ended up only able to do a 30 or 40 minute set and that isn't me. I don't want people thinking I'm only turning up for the money." A side-effect of his illness – and its treatment – has been sweeping bouts of depression. "There have been times when I have actually felt like I have wanted to die," he admitted. "The after-effects of chemo are like the worst hangover you have ever had – then when I wasn't able to perform I began to wonder what the point was." But his faith ("I'm a Catholic, I'm not a Bible thumper, but I believe there is a higher authority"), his fans ("they are so supportive – we keep in touch via net and phone – and they follow me everywhere which is wonderful") and his partner Jamie have all played a part in his recovery. "At times it can be more difficult on a partner than on yourself, but Jamie has been wonderful," said Joe. "Every day at the hospital he has been with me. There were times I couldn't even walk up the stairs. We work well together. He calms me down and won't let me do too much too soon – even though that's my way. Jamie does things by the book." And together with Blackpool-based comedian Tony Jo – who will open the show for Joe during the summer – they will be making sure the entertainer doesn't take on too much. "I'll be doing the odd night here or there – there's the Royal Concert Hall in Glasgow and the possibility of a couple of nights in Paris," says Joe. The latter is a result of his long friendship with Engelbert Humperdinck. "I was too ill to see him at the Opera House last time, but he invited me to his hotel," says Joe. "He'd been watching my Sheffield concert video on his tour bus and said he'd not seen anything like it. He said he'd like me to play Las Vegas again – and then he mentioned Paris. He's such a genuine guy." He is realistic about how much hangs on the next series of tests. He says: "There's this feeling that if I don't have the bone marrow, it's goodnight Vienna." One thing is certain, by this time next year he wants to have stopped smoking. "I know it looks bad but it's very addictive and I'm the sort who gets addicted," he says. "It's hard to quit right now. "My mum said to me the other day – 'Joe, you've done what you set out to do, relax a bit and smell the roses while you're still in the garden'. That's what I'm trying to do." back to top site design_navajo media